A 'Changing Place?'

We talk a lot about inclusive cities or smart cities.

Buzzwords like accessibility, universal design, and diversity are tossed around in policy documents and press releases as if they’re already achieved.

But here’s the truth:

If your city doesn’t have adequate Changing Places facilities, then your city is not inclusive. It’s not accessible. And it’s definitely not modern.

Changing Places are fully accessible bathrooms designed for people with complex disabilities.

They go well beyond standard accessible toilets and include:

An adult-sized, height-adjustable change table, a ceiling hoist system, enough space for a wheelchair user and multiple carers, a privacy screen or curtain. In short: basic dignity.

If you’ve never needed a Changing Place, chances are you’ve never checked whether one exists nearby.

But for families like mine, our entire day hinges on finding one. And even then, we are bracing ourselves.

Because like most parents of a disabled child, I don’t just hope the facility is clean. I pack for the worst.

We carry an arsenal.

Gloves, wipes, liners, spare clothes, sanitiser. If the space isn’t clean (and too often, it isn’t), we still have to make it work.

And honestly? I would rather change Kaedyn in the boot of our car than on the cold tiles of a so-called accessible toilet that hasn’t been cleaned properly.

At least the car is ours. It’s safe. It’s familiar.

But that’s not dignity. That’s coping in a system that forgot us.

Our family loves to get out. We love markets, food trucks, expos, disability events, pop culture days. If it’s on, we want to be there, but that enthusiasm only gets us so far.

Because if the venue doesn’t have a Changing Place, our decision isn’t based on interest. It becomes about logistics. Time gets rationed. Schedules change. Our plans shrink.

When we do go, it usually involves calling weeks ahead to ask if something is available. And if not, I ask what can be made available.

I will not accept a no.

I will not accept excuses.

Not when it comes to my son’s dignity and hygiene.

The idea of carrying a yoga mat in the car isn’t lost on me. It’s not even a joke anymore since we are long past parenting rooms and Kaedyn would never fit on those infant sized change tables.

In fact, we’ve long relied on a cheap polar fleece blanket from Kmart, layered with a bluey. That has been our makeshift solution.

There have been countless times when that blanket was the only option.

We’ve had to find a quiet corner at a venue and build privacy with our bodies instead of walls.

It becomes a whole family affair.

Dante and Phil stand either side of Kaedyn, shielding him from view while I change him as quickly as I can.

I support the weight of his legs. We work around wind, heat, rain or whatever the elements throw at us, because you can’t schedule a poop.

We’re seasoned.

We’ve been changing nappies for 13 years.

Rarely have I missed a day.

But let me be clear: A baby is nothing like a 65kg young man.

This isn’t just hard work.

It is physically demanding, emotionally exhausting and relentless. It can damage Kaedyn’s confidence and push my body past its limits.

And it is all made harder because the systems meant to support inclusion haven’t kept pace with reality.

Perth Showgrounds-

We found a small backroom “bathroom” with just enough bench space. It took me and two support workers to complete the change while Kaedyn sat anxiously due to how narrow and unsafe the setup was. It was just a long bench space that we lined with blueys.

Perth Convention Centre-

Kaedyn attended a leadership conference as a student councillor. I called ahead and was told there was no Changing Place. They tried. They gave me a standard 'accessible' bathroom and a foldable 6ft table lined with bin bags. That became our change table. I was alone. Just me, Kaedyn and a rush of adrenaline.

Full marks for effort, but a venue like that should already have a Changing Place.

This is the lived experience of thousands of families, every single day.

A truly modern city doesn’t just build for the majority.

It builds for everyone.

This is about dignity.

This is about safety.

This is about belonging.